BEAUTY TIPS AND THE BEAST: HOW TO ATTRACT, SEDUCE AND KEEP A MAN.

by T. O' Donnell.

 
Men want very little from women, and here is what they want:

1. Sex, as raunchy as possible.

2. Beauty.

Much less important:

3. Mothering (of them!)

4. A housekeeper.

5. A son.

 

By broadcasting the idea that you are capable of providing all five, you may attract, seduce and keep almost any man.

Why almost? Well, I recommend that you don't go for a man who is manifestly unsuitable for you.

How do you define unsuitable? I define it like so:

There are four types of man in the world when it comes to seduction:

1. Turns you on, and which you can turn on.

2. Turns you on, but which you haven't a hope with.

3. Doesn't turn you on, but which finds YOU very attractive.

4. Doesn't turn you on, and who doesn't find you attractive either.

Ideally, go for the first type. Go for the No. 3 only if you're desperate. Don't waste your time and energy with the others.

In love, as in war, KNOW THYSELF if you want to succeed.

You want a man who's got the potential to be a good provider and good in bed, and a good father and husband, and it wouldn't hurt if you found him handsome too.

A psychologist would say you should examine your relationship with your own father.

Whether he was a good or great man, or a louse, you will compare your beaus with him. If you had a good relationship with him, and he was a good man, your relations with men are likely to be good.

If it was bad, you will try to compensate by finding a man better than him, or place unnecessary strain on your relationships with boyfriends, by bringing feelings you have for your father to bear on them. The poor saps won't know what the matter is with you.

Or you find yourself unconsciously dating, and even marrying, men like your father.

He was the foremost male in your life for many years, your protector, and the examplar of social behaviour. Or he was weak. Or a wretch. Or not there at all. All girls want to love their daddies, like all boys love their mammies, and quite often find sexual partners who are like them, or substitutes for them.

It's fashionable to criticise Freudian theories these days. I think however people dislike Freud because he shone a torch on some very unpleasant aspects of the human psyche. Their own conscious minds can't acknowledge such terrible thoughts and feelings, so they figuratively 'shoot the messenger'.

So examine the weak spots in your character. How did they get there, really? What childhood incident caused your character to have that strength or flaw?

Examine the character of both your parents; you are a combination of both. Self-knowledge gives moral strength, and moral strength is attractive to others.

Lying to yourself, self-deception, is a pathway to Hell, and you will be the authoress of misery for others.

 
So, how to attract such a man, assuming he's suitable?

1. Your Appearance

You should give the impression that you are seeking sex.

If the first impression that a man gets of you conforms to his sexual ideal, he's yours.

This does not mean dressing and acting like a tart. It means giving subtle, and if necessary, overt signs that you are in heat, not to put too fine a point on it.

Men are simple creatures. If you dress and make yourself up like a librarian, or a nun in secular clothes, you're more likely to be ignored.

What's that, he should see the 'real you' underneath? Hah ha, my dear, take a look in the mirror. Isn't how you appear at the moment the real you; a bit frumpy, lacking in self-confidence, maybe even retiring, too lazy to make yourself up?

Appearances matter. Appearances are taken for the reality.

LOVE BEGINS AT THE FIRST ENCOUNTER. If he encounters a plain Jane, why investigate her further? Why should a man take the time to get to know the real you if there's another more feisty female to be had who looks like she just might 'put out'? Get that chip off your shoulder right now.

If you wait for Mr Right to climb your ivory tower you'll wait forever.

TO SUM UP: With men, love comes in through the eyes, with women, through the ears.

If you look like the sum of his sexual fantasies, and his romantic ideal, even if it's not really you, and even if you reveal the 'real you' later, you've as good as got him. So let's do something about your appearance first.

Let's start from the top: your hair.

HAIR

You hair should be long, if possible. Long hair is the first thing that, from a distance, suggests femininity. Short hair is for boys or nuns or middle-aged women. If you find yourself attracted to wimpy, artistic, self-effacing, intellectual men, then by all means leave it short. They have just a touch of homosexuality in them, and you'll fit their bill. To complete the picture, if your breasts are small and you have a boyish figure... Interestingly, at the time of writing, this is very much the fashion. What does that say about men and women today?

It should not be perfectly coiffed. If your hair is just a little tousled it suggests that you've just got out of bed or a roll in the hay, with all that implies. If the cut is too severe it suggests narcissism, neurosis and excessive self-preoccupation i.e. you're not going to be as interested in him as you are in yourself.

As to colour - colour it if you can carry it off, and your hair is mousy, and it makes a dramatic improvement. Use conditioner to give the appearance of health. Health is sexy - it subconsciously suggests you may make a good child-bearer, and are geneticially sound. If your normal hair has a good sheen and colour leave off colouring it - it will be hard to find a colour to match your skin tone.

Colouring it blonde has one good effect; blondes have more fun because an obvious bleach job screams 'tart!' to the world, and attracts men.

This has to be balanced against how your work colleagues may act towards you, if you work with women. Women are very competitive sexually, and may look down on you if you get an obvious dye job. To counter this, dress demurely in the work-place.

Raven black and raving red are good too. What you are doing is giving a very obvious sign that you wish to increase your attractiveness. To whom? Your mother? No! To men, of course, and they'll unconsciously notice this and come sidling over.

Another mistake women make with regards to their hair is getting it cut in the latest fashion regardless of whether this suits them or not.

There is possibly only one style of haircut that sets your face off to it's best advantage, and you probably already know it. So stick with it. I know a new hairdo gives you confidence, and that in itself makes you attractive, but striving to look like the latest film-star for the sake of it is folly. It may not suit you at all, and you'll look like all the other girls.

It won't hurt your chances at all if you look different to other girls. In fact it'll greatly increase them. Men love a touch of the exotic - unusual clothes, provocative manner, classical hairdo.

Oh, and keep it clean and sweet smelling, obviously. If a man you desire says 'You look different', or compliments you on your appearance, or notices you (and doesn't snigger!), you've done a good job.

IMPORTANT NOTE: You may NOT rely on the opinions of your female friends regarding your attractiveness to men. Your friends are happy if you look nice, AS LONG AS YOU DON'T LOOK SEXIER THAN THEM.

Every girl has her frumpy pal who "has such a nice personality, it's a pity she doesn't have a boyfriend". She's your pal because she's no competition. From her point of view she's hoping some of your glamour will rub off on her, or she's glad of any company. Admit it, a part of you is secretly GLAD if your friends don't look as good as you, and have just broken up with their boyfriends. YESSS! You're ahead in the mating race, ha ha!

Cue non-heartfelt commiserations with the poor dear. Note how the first sentence out of their mouths if you tell THEM of your boyfriend troubles is "the bastard - dump him!"